- Nov 10, 2003
- 5,129
- Moderator
- #1
So I figured I'd do something for April fools day, and here it is. I sent a fake outage report to my boss, here is what a typical outage report looks like:
OLS Outage Report
Site/skill Impacted: Timmins Connections
Outage Report update # : 1
Owner: *****
Ticket #: 13517
Date: March 30th 2011
Outage Start time: 7:03am EST
Skill/ Queue:
ETR: NA
Next update: 8:30am EST
Outage Level: 1
# CSR’s Scheduled: NA
#CRS’s affected: NA
Impact: Yes
Update Distro: *****
Action Taken: (Pages/Status)
Advised by ticket at 7:20am EST
Called Local I.T. at 7:25am EST
Called Northern Tel at 7:27am EST
Update Details (What has changed)
Timmins is loosing connection every 5-10 mins causing agents to drop ICM causing longer calls. Calls are NOT dropping. Local I.T. Andrew is on his way in.
Timeline (Including previous updates and times)
Advised by ticket at 7:20am EST
Called Local I.T. at 7:25am EST
Called Northern Tel at 7:27am EST
Outage Classifications:
Level 1 production impacting outage as a result of an OLS internal issue (IE server failure)
Level 2 production impacting outage as a result of a supplier issue (IE fiber break)
Level 3 production impacting outage as a result of a client side issue (IE Citrix outage)
Level 4 is a non production impacting outage.( IE Email or CMS outage.)
And here is my fake one:
OLS Outage Report
Site/skill Impacted: Timmins
Outage Report update # 01
Owner: Mike Llewellyn
Ticket # 5318008
Date: April 1, 2011
Outage Start time: 9:00am EDT
Skill/ Queue: NA
ETR: NA
Next update: NA
Outage Level: Level 3
# CSR’s Scheduled: 8
#CRS’s affected: 4
Impact: Mutants attacking site
Update Distro: mutantattack.***@****.com
Action Taken: (Pages/Status)
Mutants attacked the started attacking the site at approximately 9:00am local time. Site IT has tried communicating with the mutants, but it just seemed to anger them. They are not responding to emails, tweets, or pokes on facebook. The doors were barricaded, but since the local IT is no handyman, the mutants made short work of the blockade. When we last checked with the site, only a few agents had been taken by the mutants. We assume they are being taken back to the mutant's HQ located under the city of Timmins, but that is unconfirmed at this time.
Update Details (What has changed)
It turns out that the mutants have one weakness: bullets to the head. Local IT and the on site Helpdesk Tech are currently working to eradicate all instances of said mutants at the site, but expect to lose a few more staff before the blight is removed.
No contact has been made to the site since 12:00, assume the worst.
Timeline (Including previous updates and times)
9:00am - First mutants spotted, first thought to be homeless people
9:15am - Mutant presence confirmed when they started eating the agents
9:50am - Mutants have consumed three agents, local IT aware of issue and investigating
11:00am - Mutant weakness verified, local IT is working on eradicating them
12:00am - Contact from site has been lost, assume the worst.
Outage Classifications:
Level 1 production impacting outage as a result of a gas leak from the local Helpdesk Tech (IE Gilles farted)
Level 2 production impacting outage as a result of a meteorite, dinosaur attack, or werewolf sighting (IE some weird shit going on)
Level 3 production impacting outage as a result of a mutant attack (IE giant gerbils, rats, etc)
Level 4 is a non production impacting outage.( IE Flash games are not working, so now Andrew has nothing to do all day.)
So yeah, what did you guys do for April Fool's Day?
TL;DR VERSION:
I sent a fake outage report to my boss for April Fools Day, what did you guys do?
OLS Outage Report
Site/skill Impacted: Timmins Connections
Outage Report update # : 1
Owner: *****
Ticket #: 13517
Date: March 30th 2011
Outage Start time: 7:03am EST
Skill/ Queue:
ETR: NA
Next update: 8:30am EST
Outage Level: 1
# CSR’s Scheduled: NA
#CRS’s affected: NA
Impact: Yes
Update Distro: *****
Action Taken: (Pages/Status)
Advised by ticket at 7:20am EST
Called Local I.T. at 7:25am EST
Called Northern Tel at 7:27am EST
Update Details (What has changed)
Timmins is loosing connection every 5-10 mins causing agents to drop ICM causing longer calls. Calls are NOT dropping. Local I.T. Andrew is on his way in.
Timeline (Including previous updates and times)
Advised by ticket at 7:20am EST
Called Local I.T. at 7:25am EST
Called Northern Tel at 7:27am EST
Outage Classifications:
Level 1 production impacting outage as a result of an OLS internal issue (IE server failure)
Level 2 production impacting outage as a result of a supplier issue (IE fiber break)
Level 3 production impacting outage as a result of a client side issue (IE Citrix outage)
Level 4 is a non production impacting outage.( IE Email or CMS outage.)
And here is my fake one:
OLS Outage Report
Site/skill Impacted: Timmins
Outage Report update # 01
Owner: Mike Llewellyn
Ticket # 5318008
Date: April 1, 2011
Outage Start time: 9:00am EDT
Skill/ Queue: NA
ETR: NA
Next update: NA
Outage Level: Level 3
# CSR’s Scheduled: 8
#CRS’s affected: 4
Impact: Mutants attacking site
Update Distro: mutantattack.***@****.com
Action Taken: (Pages/Status)
Mutants attacked the started attacking the site at approximately 9:00am local time. Site IT has tried communicating with the mutants, but it just seemed to anger them. They are not responding to emails, tweets, or pokes on facebook. The doors were barricaded, but since the local IT is no handyman, the mutants made short work of the blockade. When we last checked with the site, only a few agents had been taken by the mutants. We assume they are being taken back to the mutant's HQ located under the city of Timmins, but that is unconfirmed at this time.
Update Details (What has changed)
It turns out that the mutants have one weakness: bullets to the head. Local IT and the on site Helpdesk Tech are currently working to eradicate all instances of said mutants at the site, but expect to lose a few more staff before the blight is removed.
No contact has been made to the site since 12:00, assume the worst.
Timeline (Including previous updates and times)
9:00am - First mutants spotted, first thought to be homeless people
9:15am - Mutant presence confirmed when they started eating the agents
9:50am - Mutants have consumed three agents, local IT aware of issue and investigating
11:00am - Mutant weakness verified, local IT is working on eradicating them
12:00am - Contact from site has been lost, assume the worst.
Outage Classifications:
Level 1 production impacting outage as a result of a gas leak from the local Helpdesk Tech (IE Gilles farted)
Level 2 production impacting outage as a result of a meteorite, dinosaur attack, or werewolf sighting (IE some weird shit going on)
Level 3 production impacting outage as a result of a mutant attack (IE giant gerbils, rats, etc)
Level 4 is a non production impacting outage.( IE Flash games are not working, so now Andrew has nothing to do all day.)
So yeah, what did you guys do for April Fool's Day?
TL;DR VERSION:
I sent a fake outage report to my boss for April Fools Day, what did you guys do?